The Da Beaner Code

thejangler · Posted: Wed Mar 05, 2008 1:28 pm Post subject: The Da Beaner Code

I'm thinking that Evan is leaving little clues to something epic (like Heyzeus's favorite skateboarder or where Jimmy Hoffa is buried) in all of his misspellings and horrible grammar throughout the board.

Please take the time and help me decipher "the Da Beaner Code"

FatCat

Replies: 5
Views: 97
PostForum: General Discussion Posted: Wednesday March 5, 2008 12:47 am Subject: Evan's Cool News

It is a truly sad day.

Read it thought.

FatCat

Replies: 196
Views: 2080
PostForum: Forum Games Posted: Tuesday March 4, 2008 6:20 pm Subject: Evan's Random Internet Awesomeness

The plot of Half-L(-a)ife 2 in a nut shell.

FatCat

Replies: 5
Views: 97
PostForum: General Discussion Posted: Monday March 3, 2008 11:19 pm Subject: Evan's Cool News

Why news be informative and fun?

FatCat

Replies: 4
Views: 51
PostForum: Roleplaying General Posted: Saturday February 23, 2008 5:08 am Subject: Big SLA news!!!

Some one find this!

Watch the hole pod-case.

FatCat

Replies: 196
Views: 2080
PostForum: Forum Games Posted: Sunday February 17, 2008 1:39 pm Subject: Evan's Random Internet Awesomeness

What the Fuck guy's. Why the Fuck has no posted this?

I'm the Juggernaot Bitch!

FatCat

Replies: 8
Views: 60
PostForum: Video Games Posted: Thursday February 14, 2008 11:15 pm Subject: Half Life 2

MEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!! Damn it ME!

Give it to me and make werth your wily!
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hilikuS · Site Admin Joined: 10 Aug 2006 Posts: 999

LHAO! Dude, that's hilarious, but not only that, about a week or two ago I started editing his posts and fixing them. The first one you have there is a product of that. he typed out Half Laife, so I changed it so it's fixed, but still shows where it was screwed up.

Some hilarious typos right there though.

Actually as far as the conspiracy goes, I think the one on the bottom is actually him hitting on Sass. I have long noticed how Evan longs for Sass's willy, and now we have proof. So maybe this isn't as epic of a plot as Dan originally thought. I think maybe it's just an elaborate (perhaps too elaborate to give him credit for) scheme to get into Sass's oversized pants. Just think about it, look how much he grinned longingly when Sass stomped the yard and showed off his man parts. Maybe you guys didn't notice, but you can definitely tell that he's into Dommi-doo. Now that I think about it, Evan will probably use that embarrasing nick name when he finally drugs him into gay sex. Sass, if you hear Dommi-doo in your fucked up dreams one night... I told you so.

I was also thinking that this has a lot to do with SLA Industries' "the truth". I mean, Evan owns the book, and it's a really weird back story anyways. All of this cryptic stuff could lead up to the truth somehow. Not to mention, I asked Tom Hanks, and he didn't tell me "no".

Theory number 3. All of this nonsense has something to do with lawl cats. The way these are written really, really reminds me of shit like "I can has cookie?" Just the lack of all the important words to make up the sentence, and stuff like that. For instance:

Why CAN'T news be informative and fun?
Give it to me and make IT werth your wily!
What the Fuck guy's. Why the Fuck has noBODY posted this?

Especially the last one, you can see a lot of lawl cats in it. Why has no posted this? Can't you just see a cute little kitten with a MS Paint made banner across the picture saying it? I sure as hell can. Someone should cook one up just to prove it.

Or maybe the missing words are part of the code. So far in the samples we have here, the missing words are:

Can't, It, Body/One. Who knows what other words were omitted in the other posts Evan made. I mean, there's close to 100 of them, so I suggest one of you researches, and finds any missing words. We also need to uncover Evan's rendition of the last supper, since that's where most of the information can be found. He didn't paint it in, but if you rip out the back, there's some poorly written notes that are gracefully coded. By gracefully coded I mean, written backwards so you just need a mirror to figure it out. The 2 missing apostles have nothing do with the code at all. The dude just ran out of fingers.

We can crack this code gods damnit!
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Asshole · I heart posting. Joined: 29 Aug 2006 Posts: 321

There's no code, he just can't speak English because he's Mexican. Many foreigners have problems speaking English, its nothing uncommon.
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FOR GREAT JUSTICE!

thejangler · Posted: Wed Mar 05, 2008 9:45 pm Post subject:

tink · Nubcake Joined: 08 Mar 2008 Posts: 39 Location: Florida

hilikuS · Site Admin Joined: 10 Aug 2006 Posts: 999

True that. In all honesty, Evan asked me to help you guys by dropping a couple of hints myself. I'm glad someone found it. The first part isn't a grammar mistake though. Another part of the de Beaner code is the word to.

I'm pretty sure I can get your password though if you want it.
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1. Death Master 3001
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Scorcho · Generous lover of posting. Joined: 16 Aug 2006 Posts: 587

hilikuS · Site Admin Joined: 10 Aug 2006 Posts: 999

hilikuS · Site Admin Joined: 10 Aug 2006 Posts: 999

Master Shake · Someone Wants a Knife Fight Joined: 02 Oct 2007 Posts: 178

werth
wily
juggernaot
guy's
pod-case
be
Half-l(-a)ife
thought

if you take all the misspelled words and rearrange them, you find an anagram.

I

want

guys.

see, evan is gay.
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thejangler · Posted: Mon Mar 24, 2008 3:25 pm Post subject:

thejangler · Posted: Mon Mar 24, 2008 3:25 pm Post subject:

And thank you Anthony, for solving the DaBeaner Code
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hilikuS · Site Admin Joined: 10 Aug 2006 Posts: 999

Lol, and you know he's such a credible source. I mean, I thought I had good gaydar, but Anthony must have the best!

BTW, the only kind of BPI Awards that were given out last year was the Who Masterbates the Most trophy, which I think I won. We could set up some kind of awards thing though. That'd be pretty fun.

Any ideas for categories? I mean, we have "funniest post" of 2008, possibly funniest poster. Not sure what else. I was thinking of something like "most likely to post content", but I don't think we can nominate anyone for that lol.
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BP's Video Game Wishlist!:
1. Death Master 3001
2. Mavis Beacon Teaches Typing in Hell
3. Devil May Cry: Wolf

Master Shake · Someone Wants a Knife Fight Joined: 02 Oct 2007 Posts: 178

hilikuS · Site Admin Joined: 10 Aug 2006 Posts: 999

Sass has expressed interest in girls, but is like too nervous to talk with them. The thing that threw me off about Evan, is that he dated girls. I mean, I know someone is going to point out the fact that he didn't sex any girls, but I just figured he wasn't interested in that sort of thing. Maybe that's a dead giveaway though.

I'm fairly certain that Sass can watch some sort of porno on his PS3.. at least I hope he can like install Quicktime or some shit. That would make me sad if he couldn't. Anyways, the point is, I'm not sure he's gay. You should point out some of the things for people to look for, when looking for gay.

Think of this as an educational interview.
_________________
BP's Video Game Wishlist!:
1. Death Master 3001
2. Mavis Beacon Teaches Typing in Hell
3. Devil May Cry: Wolf